I had one of those moments when I suddenly realized, in one small area, at least, how incredibly parochial I can be. It came while watching this clip of Eric Clapton playing Big Bill Broonzy's Key to the Highway:
Did you notice the Japanese subtitles? I realized that although the words could explain approximately what he was singing, they could never get close to the style. Little slurs, bends in the language itself, regional deliveries, accents - there's no way you can get any of that from letters scrolled at the bottom of the screen. And then I realized how little I get from performances by foreign musicians. Beyond the words, you get into delivery, idiom, and a host of other things that fall into a context when you're from that culture. For example, I'll have different associations for delta blues and Chicago electric. I know how something about how they're related and how they differ. But unless you've learned about this one way or the other, the resonance of experience, like overtones from your own life, simply don't exist.
If at all possible, talk the person insisting on buying the desk out of it. If the person buys it without asking in advance, assuming that you will perform said assembly, consider cutting your losses, burning down the house with the kit, and starting over.
Assuming you are unsuccessful at step one, the proceed. Examine the room in which the desk is to go. It will inevitably require 2 7/8-inches more in length than is available. Resign yourself to rearranging the furniture.
During step 2, when you wonder why the bookshelf won't move, before you disassemble it into its constituent parts, check the top, just beyond where you can see, in case you had cautiously used a bracket to screw it into place. You screwed it so it's screwing you, which means you are the shelf. It's a zen thing.
Examine the room again. You will have to put semi-assembled parts everywhere and you don't have enough floor space. Build an extension before unboxing the kit. Once you're committed to the process, it will be too late. This will also help you put off the assembly project for another few months.
Open the box and read the directions. You will need to write the company for the original in whatever language it was penned because success will require a new translation. Hope for good pictures. Even if they don't help you to build the desk, they might be pretty.
Look at the list of required tools. It is a lie. You will need more than what the instructions suggest, including the following:
electric drill
flathead screwdriver
Phillips screwdriver
several types of drivers you've never heard of before and that are unavailable at the local hardware, lumber, and auto parts stores
a winch
three critical screws you were shorted in the package plus an additional 3 that rolled under the couch only to fall into your little part of the Bermuda Triangle
a machine shop
a distillery
a chapel
The instructions may say that you can build this by yourself although a few steps might benefit from the assistance of another person or two. Actually, only step 13 can be done by yourself. The others require three additional people, including one named Eddie who sports several prison tattoos. Don't make any sudden movements, as you may startle him and that is something you do not wish to do.
You will need to set aside some time. Actually, a fair amount of time. Actually, how many weeks of vacation do you have left? That's all? Hmm. Well, give it a try anyway. If you work on this part-time, you may be done by spring or before your significant other is ready to shoot you, whichever comes later.
Page six of the instructions is a misprint and is intended for a different piece of furniture. Ignore it. Try praying for insight. (See step 6 for what you will need.)
At one point you will try to put the sheet metal screw into the metal tube and find that no matter how hard you push and turn, it won't go in. The trick is to find your electric drill to finish the pilot hole. Unfortunately, you won't be able to find your drill bits, so you'll have to head to the nearest hardware store. When you return, it will become apparent that the pilot hole actually was drilled through. You just need to push harder. Eddie can help, but you probably don't want him standing behind you. Don't judge, as we all have our quirks.
Toward the end of the process, you will have to connect three pieces of the desk. They will almost go together. Consider the imperfection endearing unless you want to start over.
It appears that Trinity Church in Manhattan's financial district has set up a Twitter account -- @twspassionplay -- to perform the Passion Play via 140-character tweets. This offends me like few other things, because it treats religious ideas as so much product to be hawked. This gives an unfortunate new meaning to Christ's followers. (Thanks to a nameless friend for this last line.)
And so, I was inspired to write the following parody ... not of the Passion Play, but of this asinine idea of moving everything to new media, whether appropriate or not, and selling religion. For those who insist on taking this as an attack on Christian idea, don't bother leaving a message here – go talk to Trinity Church. They're the ones trying to make personal gain off this.
@Narrator: Last Supper
@Christ: Dig in. #apostles
@Christ: Bread, anyone? #apostles
@Christ: Pass the wine. #apostles
@Luke: @ Jesus Good wine. What vintage?
@Christ: @Luke Five minute ago.
@Peter: Pass the potatoes. #apostles
@Judas: @Peter Sorry, took the last one.
@Christ: One of you will betray me. #apostles
@Peter: @Christ Is it I?
@Andrew: @Christ Is it I?
@BigJames: @Christ Is it I?
@LittleJames: @Christ Is it I?
@John: @Christ Is it I?
@Philip: @Christ Is it I?
@Bartholomew: @Christ Is it I?
@Matthew: @Christ Is it I?
@Thomas: @Christ Is it I?
@Thaddeus: @Christ Is it I?
@Simon: @Christ Is it I?
@Christ: Nice grammar. #apostles
@Judas: @Christ Is it I?
@Christ: RT @Judas: @Christ Is it I?
@Peter: @Christ I'll go to prison with you.
@Christ: @Peter Oh, yeah. Right.
@Christ: I'm short on cash. Anyone have the tip? #apostles
@Judas: @Christ Not now, but I will soon.
@Christ: I'm going for a walk. Anyone else? #apostles
@Narrator: Garden of Gethsemane:
@Christ: @Father Do I hafta?
@Christ: @Father Hello?
@Christ: Stop snoring! #apostles
@Judas: @Christ [smooch]
@Christ: @Judas Eeewww!
@RomanSoldier1: @Christ Time's up.
@Christ: @RomanSoldier1 Yes, I've already heard.
@Narrator: Christ Judged
@Crowd1: @Christ Guilty!
@Crowd2: @Christ Pfffft.
@Crowd3: @Peter Aren't you a friend of his?
@Peter: @Crowd3 Sorry, don't know him.
@Crowd4: @Peter I've seen you with him.
@Peter: @Crowd4 Nope.
@Crowd5: @Peter Me too.
@Peter: @Crowd5 Said I don't know him!
@Rooster: Cockadoodle doo.
@Peter: Oops.
@Pilate: I don't see a problem. #crowd
@Priest: @Pilate He's a troublemaker.
@Pilate: Send him to @Herod. #crowd
@Herod: @Christ Come on … just a *little* miracle?
@Herod: Take him back to @Pilate. #crowd
@Pilate: @Christ Sorry, dude.
@Narrator: Christ on the Cross
@RomanSoldier2: Nail him down. #soldiers
@Christ: Ow!
@Christ: @Father Forgive them. They know not what they tweet.
He was one of the driving artistic forces of the Italian Renaissance, an influence on all art that came after, an engineer and scientist, inventor, someone capable of drawing with one hand while writing a treatise backwards with the other, and ... the father of evolution?
He explicitly says "apes, monkeys and the like" are not merely related to humans but indeed "almost of the same species". In other words, Leonardo, writing simply on the basis of his own observations more than 500 years ago, says pretty much the same thing the modern science writer Jared Diamond, on the basis of DNA evidence, argues in his book The Rise and Fall of the Third Chimpanzee. Nor is this a stray observation. Leonardo says it again, in a note on internal anatomy: "Describe the various forms of the intestines of the human species (delle spetie umana), of apes and suchlike. Then, in what way the leonine species differ ... "
Next thing you know, someone will find somewhere in his notebooks descriptions of the calculus, quantum physics, velcro, and the smoothie.
I haven't seen it yet, but hope to travel down to Manhattan to take in the Metropolitan Museum's Art of the Korean Resaissance. (Be sure to click on the multimedia link that has 11 images of objects in the exhibit.) The more usual association of Renaissance is European, but apparently the time from the 15th to 17th centuries was a period of artistic experimentation. Unfortunately, a series of invasions wiped out most examples of the work, as might have happened had such tribes as the Franks and Visigoths invaded Europe after DaVinci, Dürer, and Dante had finished their work. You can find more information on the exhibit here.
Also be sure to look at the special exhibits page of the Met's web site. It looks as though there are some other displays that would provide some interesting contrasts, including drawings from Raphael to Renoir, arts of the Ming Dynasty, and early Buddhist manuscript painting
I was noodling on the web, trying to find some sites that covered using colored pencils. (I'm expanding beyond graphite/charcoal/ink.) Surprisingly, to me at least, I found some interesting techniques on Crayola's site. I'm particularly taken with the idea of impressing a set of lines into some thick paper and then rubbing over the surface with a colored pencil (obviously doesn't have to be Crayola). I think you'd have to avoid the standard CP advice of keeping the tip really sharp and, instead, using the side of the pencil. I could also see this working with pastels.
Occasionally, when I have down time (waiting as I am now for comments back on outlines and articles), I'll see what oddness is on the Sci-Fi channel. And today it's a show called Charlie Jade, a series about a detective trapped in a parallel universe. The concept is interesting enough, but the execution is marvelous and quite unlike what you will see in American television -- perhaps because it is a coproduction of Canadian and South African media companies. Largely filmed in South Africa, it has an unselfconscious multiracial casting that is unlike most of what I see in the U.S. There are no "quirky" or specifically "ethnic" characters that become a calculated faux representationalism. On one hand, society collectively pretends that filling the quotas is the same as being unbiased.
At the same time, there is a sense of the other meaning of representationalism, a philosophical approach in which the mind is said to actually perceive representations of objects and not the objects themselves. (In contrast to the Socratic concept of the ideal and human perception of shadows of representations of reality.) I find it interesting that South Africa can appear to have, at least in terms of entertainment, a far more relaxed attitude.
But forget the social musings for a moment. This is also a gorgeously and intelligently filmed series. The angles and approaches to lighting are far different than you find here. For example, in many dramatic series, harshly blown out highlights from powerful overhead lighting, ala The West Wing or the newest Battlestar Galactica, has become de rigeur.
In Charlie Jade, there is an impressive use of color and filming technique. Using two different palettes, one of muted cools and the other of muted warms (not quite as harsh as, but similar to the color cast you get when using tungsten-balanced film outside and daylight-balanced inside), they set up contrasting worlds. The lighting doesn't call as much attention to itself but still underscores the tone of the story telling.
Apparently there was only one season filmed, though a second is written and ready for production. Hopefully someone will fund it -- and maybe some U.S. production companies will pay attention and start thinking differently about how they approach the medium. It's time to shake up the predictable.
A blog about images and words, photography and plays, art and articles, and any other combination or alliteration that takes my fancy. I'm a writer, photographer, and guy trying to learn to draw and paint.
About Me
Name: Erik Sherman
Location: Massachusetts, United States
I'm an independent writer and photographer who covers business, food, technology, books, media, general features, and pretty much anything appealing that results in a signed check. My work has appeared in such places as the New York Times Magazine, Newsweek, Newsweek Japan, Fortune, Inc, Fortune Small Business, the Financial Times, Advertising Age, Saveur, US News & World Report, and Continental
